Rivals in Arms
by NeedlessToSay-NeedMoreToThink
Summary: It's a war in which they're allies, both wanting to fight for the enemy. Multiple pairings, yaoi, and dark themes - be warned
1. During Despair

**Rivals in Arms - Rated M (for things ranging from language to yaoi to etc.)**

**Spoilers: Some mention of things in Shipudden and stuff  
Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, the current storyline of the manga would not be... isn't it a shame that I don't own it?  
Setting: Somewhat AU - takes place after the first encounter with Sasuke but before Jirayia's battle with Pein**

**Summary: It's a war in which they're allies, both wanting to fight for the enemy side  
**

* * *

**Chapter One - The Dimension**

The dobe was at it again, but this time, things were different. I watched him leap towards me, his face twisted in fury, alongside an agony which I have long known. And then, the fated word, the one which he prided above most everything else - my name, screamed like a curse, as he cried from his core, "Rasengan!"

A searing pain rapt it's coils around me; I couldn't breathe, let alone fight back. My mind went numb as my body stiffened. I tasted blood; it smelt like fire.

My eyes were closing against my will; my mouth wouldn't move, and my voice was dead. The world was swimming and I was drowning. All was real, and moist, and burning.

And I realized... I was defeated.

...I was dying,

and I was damned.

**Sakura's POV (5 months earlier)**

He smiled at me sheepishly, scratching his neck as he nervously laughed. "So uh," he began, "What about this time, Sakura-chan?"

I sighed apolegetically, before smiling back in response. "Sorry, Naruto. I have plans." My tone was even - we both knew I was lying.

"Oh, uh right - I should have known. Next time, maybe?" Naruto squeaked.

"Yeah..." I lied. "Maybe next time."

A real grin spread across his face. "Really Sakura? You're the best!" He leapt to hug me; I accepted it silently. I never hugged back, though I knew that he wanted me to - his hugs were enough for me, but never for him. "In that case, I guess I'll go train," he continued, abruptly releasing me. He began to run off towards the fields, but turned around. "Ichi maru's tonight?...As friends."

He gazed at the ground as he asked his question, a beaten dog, who loved unconditionally. I sometimes wondered if deep down, Naruto knew it all... if his response was merely an act to match my own. "Yeah," I responded, "As friends." He looked towards me and smiled hopefully.

"See you later!" he cried excitedly, bounding off towards the noise of jutsu. For a moment, I felt like following him, since I really had nothing planned. But I decided it would be a bad idea, one that I'd end up regretting. So instead, I sat down on a log, and listened uncaringly to the forest's chatter. There was a bench a few feet away from me, but it had too many memories for me to consider it.

Just seeing it was making me hurt. I turned my head as my eyes grew blurry.

From under my seat, I heard tiny movements, which I tried to focus on to distract me. It worked for a while, and I watched the bugs scurry, completely enthralled by their teamwork, and ability to relax me. But suddenly, I heard the sound of larger footprints, which were further away but coming near. They startled me, making me jump, and stand ready for whoever was approaching. .

As a kunoichi, the slightest sound was a warning, and even in Konoha, I was hard-pressed to ignore it. I reached into my holster and grabbed a kunai. "Come. out." I ordered, snarling.

The bushes rustled as two figures emerged, one dressed in a fur coat with glasses, the other in a black-and-red two-piece. "Already have," the ladder replied, his voice dead-serious, and his expression matching. The boy in the coat turned towards his companion, a brow raised slightly above his glasses. "Really, Sai?" he questioned dully. "Why was I never informed?"

"You were last night," Sai replied smirking. Hands in his pockets, Shino stared at him blankly. "Explain," he ordered, seriously. Sai stared at him dumbstruck.

Dumbstruck herself by their conversation, Sakura shook herself back to Earth. "What did you two want?" she questioned, perplexed. They looked back to her somewhat somberly. "You said no... again," Sai began. "It can't be good for his self-esteem, Hag."  
Preventing herself from stating the obvious, Sakura sat back down, sighing again. "Well, what am I supposed to do? I can't go on a date with him when I lo- don't love him that way."

No one asked her to correct her statement, though they knew she had meant something else. "Yes you can," Shino stated. "Hinata and I tried, and look what happened."

"... You two stopped speaking, and refuse to do missions together. She hates you, and you badmouth her constantly."

"... Well, yes, in hindsight, it's a bad example... but it did get her mind off of Naruto."

Everyone remembered that fated day when Hinata found the strength to tell Naruto her feelings. They remembered the horrible truth it had revealed, that Naruto felt that way, but for someone else. They remembered the tears and the following surprise, that Shino felt that way for Hinata. And then the date, and then the break up, and then the messy, strange lingerings between them.

"That's true - she hasn't mentioned him since," admitted Sakura, as she stared at her feet. Sai walked towards her and gripped her shoulder. "You might as well try it; you both need someone."

Pushing his hand aside, Sakura lifted her face towards his. "I'm doing fine on my own," she snapped, glaring at his implication.

"Whatever you say, Hag..." he replied, stepping back. "But you know, you've been lying quite a lot recently. All those conversations with Ino, whe-"

"How the Hell did you hear those?!"

Sai would later claim he'd been hurt in a mission when people questioned his black-and-blue eye. With a sullen "Ow!" he fell to the floor, and looked upwards at a fuming Sakura. To ward the attention away from himself, he pointed behind him at a stoic Shino. "Shino planted his bugs," he responded defensively. Surprised, Sakura turned towards Shino.

Shrugging, Shino nodded, before responding, "It was Sai who asked me to plant them."

Sakura scowled, turning back towards him. "So what did you hear?" she questioned Sai.  
"... Enough to know that you need someone," he answered honestly. "Anyone, and right now, if possible. We really care about you, Hag."

"And if you died in a mission... if you died intentionally..."

**Naruto's POV (same time as Sakura's)**

"Really, Sakura? Your'e the best!" I jumped towards her and hugged her thankfully, already knowing that she wouldn't hug back. She really was beautiful, inside and out, for letting me think that she'd ever give me a chance.

I knew that she wouldn't... but it's nice to pretend.

"In that case, I guess I'll go train," I smiled, releasing her quickly. Letting go of her made me cold; it always did, and I always regretted it. I ran towards the sound of the training field, but a thought made me abruptly turn back. "Ichi maru's tonight?" I asked. "... As friends," I added unhappily.

The silence was heavy as I awaited her response. Relief warmed me as she answered, "Yeah. As friends." She grinned back at me, and it was loving, but it was sad with hidden meaning

"See you later!" I screamed, running off happily, at least to the view of any nearby bystanders. Inwardly, I was crushed, and as always, I had no idea why.

The field was nearby, so my run was short, though it felt long with the weight of uncertainty. As I walked towards it, I heard a scream. "YOU CHEATED! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!"

A blurry mane sped its way towards me. "Naruto, watch out! Ino's gone nuts!"

"Kiba - wha -" I had time to ask, before being pushed forward towards the scream. "KIBA!"

"You never saw me," Kiba whispered, before running behind me, into the forest. Before I could process the data, a hand grabbed my throat. I saw a yellow streak as I was raised into the air.

Growling, Ino ordered, "Where. did. he. go?"

"Kiba?" I responded confused.

Her gripped tightened. "Yes. Kiba."

"Oh," I replied. "He went that way."

Stupidly, I pointed behind me. As she dropped me roughly, I realized my mistake. "Oh wait! I mean - " I began.

"Save. it." She interjected, as she started towards the forest. "I'm about to go kill him - if you don't want to join him, I advise you leave."

I gulped. "What did he do?"

She glared as she responded "We were sparring and then he cheated. That's all you need to know."

"Uh... in that case, good luck killing him." I responded, stepping away.

She nodded before running off. Moment's later I heard a cry. I could make out the words "enemy" and "snap your bra," but after that, I chose to stop listening. Recently, Ino had become scarier than Sakura, and I didn't want to be in her line of fire.

I continued towards the tree enclosure where I could practice my newest jutsu. I heard noises in the distance, which grew louder as I walked forward. "No, Chouji, it's not edible," I distinctively heard someone say. "Hey, Naruto - want to join us?" the same voice asked as I walked through the trees. The sight before me was an odd one, and my first impulse was to say "No," but instead, I questioned curiously, "What are you guys doing here?"

Lying on the floor, gazing skyward, was a group of four, all serene. I had seen Chouji and Shikamaru do this before, but Neji and Lee? Well that was a new one.

"Embracing our youth," Rock Lee began, "Through loving nature and being one with our friends. An act which brings us closer to all around us, and makes us see the world for its true beauty"

"... We're cloud watching," Shikamaru clarified. "And Chouji says they look like donuts today."

I looked above me towards the sky. "They sort of do," I agreed, squinting.

"My favorite donut's are the frosted white-sprinkly ones. Or the chocolate, or the creme-filled with nuts." Chouji stared above himself mystified. Before he could continue, Neji cut in.

"Why don't you sit down, Naruto?"

Surprised that he'd been the one to ask, and the fact that he was there at all, I felt obliged to do so. "All right," I said lying next to him.

At my answer, the field grew quiet, and I couldn't help but feel slightly awkward. I stared at the sky, along with the others, but today, I didn't see anything. After a moment, I sat up. "Well this is fun," I lied, as they turned to me. "And sorry, but I really need to train. I guess - "

Neji turned back to the sky. "My favorite are the blueberry," he suddenly and randomly announced. I stared at him perplexed. "Yeah," I agreed. "Those are good."

"Really? I like the butterscotch."

I turned towards Shikamaru at his words. "I didn't even know those existed."

"Maybe they don't, but I still can like them."

Lee and Chouji continued to stare at me. "Naruto," Lee began. "What's your favorite? "

"Type of donut?"

"Yes. Do you have one."

I thought a moment, unsure of what to say. "I don't know," I replied. "Never thought of it."

Lee and Chouji turned back to the sky.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Chouji stated. "I like them all - it's so hard to choose."

I stood up - none of them looked at me. "... No, that's not it. I've really just never thought of it."

Neji glanced at me from the corner of his eye. "Maybe you should," he advised, sitting up. "It's best to know which one is your favorite, even if it's the worst one for you."

Shikamaru suddenly stood up, and Neji followed his lead.

"Naruto - come talk a second."

Baffled I stuttered, "Oo-kay."

Leaving the other two to their clouds, the three of us walked a distance away. When he felt we were far enough, Neji turned towards me, and crossed his arms as if he were angry. "So it went badly again, correct?"

His question was really a statement. "Never fails to," I responded. Shikamaru shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Naruto. I don't know what to say... except that "maybe it'll go better next time"."

I raised a brow at his patronizing answer. "You're the genius - will it go better next time?"

"... Sorry, Naruto," he repeated, "But these games are not my specialty."

"Nor mine," Neji contributed. "Though I tend to bet against the losing team."

I sighed, feeling lost. "Can you see her now?" I questioned Neji.

Neji was staring off in the distance, his eyes veiny, clear and focused. "She is currently attacking Sai," he answered, matter-of-factly.

"Was he arguing for or against me?"

"Unsure, but I would think for."

My heart began to tear. "In which case, she is saying no."

"We don't know that, Naruto," Shikamaru frowned. "Stay positive - don't give up."

I looked away from him, hating my thoughts. "But what if she wants me to?"

Neither would answer my question, so I answered it for myself.

"I know, I know," I despaired. "If I give up on her, she'll give up on herself."

"...Naruto, you need each other."

"... That doesn't mean that we want to."

* * *

**Yes, I know, I spelled a few things wrong, but this idea came to me randomly and I literally sat down and wrote it all out. So, any opinions? I already have the whole thing outlined, and I can't wait to write it, but don't want to if no one will read it X.X. So, if you understand where I'm going with this and you like it, let me know please! Or if you have any suggestions, etc. Thanks! **


	2. The Dimension

**Rivals in Arms**

**Chapter 2 - The Destiny  
Warnings: Stuff?  
Disclaimer: Not mine!**

I didn't want it all to end like this, so utterly and despairingly empty. I had no one, no one but enemies, who once had loved me... and who I still loved. But it _was _ending; this I knew, no matter how hard I wished and prayed it was otherwise.

All that I had left was what I remembered; the memories surfaced as my heart sank in tears.

**Sakura's POV (5 months earlier)  
**

The smell of spices floated all around me, making my nose itch as I indulged in the aroma. Beside me, Naruto was laughing.

"Awh! This has got to be the best ramen yet!"

Dropping his chopsticks, Naruto leaned backwards. A prominent gut stuck from under his shirt. But I knew that as always it would be gone before morning; fox magic - the diet's newest alternative.

"So what did you think, Sakura-Chan?" he happily questioned, gazing towards me.

I shrugged. "Good as always; but thanks again for paying for mine."

"Ha, what are friends for?" he answered back, smiling brighter. He jumped off the stool and I followed suit. We waved bye to the chefs, and were on our way into the depths of Konoha's night.

The moon was out, and it was beautiful. The sky was as warm and as blue as the ocean; brimming with stars, which sparkled endlessly, I wanted nothing more than to stare there forever. Distinctly, I heard the chirping of crickets, the beautiful music of the nightfall's creatures. It was a lovely, peaceful, _wonderful _night... but I knew that in seconds, my words would ruin it.

"So, Sakura..." Naruto began. With a look, I abruptly cut him off.

"Not now," I advised him softly; he understood, and stopped his question. We sat down on the forest floor; we'd reached our spot, our special spot - the spot where years ago, he had saved me from Gaara. The very Gaara who was now my close ally.

It was funny to think back to those days, to how drastically our relationships had changed over time... some for the better, some for the worse. Some unexpectedly, and some long ago prophesied. I could still remember it, the day I'd seen it; the day I knew that things had changed. When he'd unknowingly revealed his curse mark to me, a curse had set itself upon everyone else.

Naruto stretched across the grass; I could tell he was thinking of the same things I was. Gazing at the sky, he absentmindedly questioned, "..How many years does tonight make it?"

I joined him on the floor, curling close to his quiet form. "I don't know - I was counting the minutes, but they got too high for me to count."

He smiled at me wanly. "Oh yeah? I was counting the seconds." He wrapped an arm around my torso as his tone took a downward spiral. "When I'd sleep, I couldn't count them, so my answer must be off." He sighed, before asking worriedly, "Are we even sure if tonight was the night?"

I squeezed his arm reassuringly. "I don't think that either of us could forget that." He smiled again and hugged me tighter, but neither of us felt like faking happiness just then; this may have been our place, but it certainly was not our night. It was a somber, sullen night, to forget, and to remember.

I'm not sure exactly when I fell asleep, but it couldn't have been much later. I stayed up long enough to hear him whisper, "I Miss You," and, dejectedly, "Happy Anniversary." But when I awoke, it was to an empty world, and I was cold without him there. Being alone in a place meant for two... I was too accustomed to ever enjoy that.

I knew where I had to go next; it was our tradition, which we never spoke of. We spent the night in our place, because we faced it together - But the day after... we would go to see _him_. Naruto had his own place, and I had mine by Konoha's gates. And as I walked there, I felt like a fool; I'd done this too many times to ever think it would end.

The bench was the same as it had been on that day, a simple, ordinary bench. Yet every year, it drew me back, as if it knew something that I did not. It never told me, but that didn't matter; what mattered was what it reminded me.

It was a simple, normal, bench, but it's significance was far above and beyond.

**Naruto's POV (5 months earlier)**

She was a peaceful angel as she slept; her troubles seemed to leave her in her dreams. Watching her sleep would always ease me; if she could find peace, then so would I. But even as I thought this, I felt myself moving away from her, moving closer to _him _and all of my problems. The past never would leave me alone, because I could never allow it.

It was the rooftop where we had fought, the one where I'd last seen him before he had... died. _Yes, _I decided. _He is dead. He didn't leave - he just sorta... died. _That makes it all so much easier for me to deal with, though I know that it's not at all true. If he is dead, I don't have to think about him, because if he's dead, there's no reason to hope.

It must be the worst feeling in the world, one of hope which can't come true. If there was even a chance, one small chance left, I would hold onto that hope with all that I have. But ever since he tried to kill us... well he's dead, so why should I bother?

... Because if he's dead, then... she's dead too. And so am I. And so is everything else! - but at least there is no false-hope to say otherwise, and no reason to believe something better.

But he is not dead, and the false hope's not either. It's all real, and so is the pain. We can't make that leave, as hard as we try. And as much as I want to, I _can't _help her.

Only he can but he never will, and I don't even know if it still is possible. But my false hope says that it still might be - I think that's why I always do this.

I jump upwards and scale the building, stopping once I reach the roof. From there, I can see everything; everything is so much clearer than it was on that day. I can clearly see the trees, the cracked paint on the building's surrounding. I can see Sakura near the gates, staring at a bench as if it will answer.

The pain I feel for her's even worse, because I know that I'm what caused it.

Deep down I know that he left because of me. And, deeper down, I know that if he comes back, it will be for her. Regardless the scenario, I'm the loser, and I know that I'm going to lose her. If he comes back, I lose her to him. And if he doesn't, I lose her because she'll _stay _lost. But whatever the case, I can't win; neither can Sakura, neither can... he.

And him... I've lost him already. The false-hope won't argue that. Whatever we had, I think is gone, and that hurts even worse.

But what has to be worst of all is the promise which I made - that I would one day bring him back to her, because I no longer think that I want to. I don't even know if I can, because it seems like nothing's left to bring home! Our Sasuke isn't Sasuke. Our past can't be our future..

So I might as well say that he's dead, because if I say that, it makes everything easier.

Right now, he's alive in my memories.. so I guess that's where I'll strike first.

**Sasuke's POV (5 months earlier, in a remote location outside of Konoha)**

The blood burned, the wind stung. The trees were whistling, the birds dead-silent. My ears were pounding like loaded canons. But I was numb, to all and everything.

To some, the sight would be frightening; a dozen jounins all posed to attack. But around them were a half dozen more, already dead, and awaiting their friends.

Upon reuniting them, I wiped off my hands, and walked back to my bed in the tree. I had no real interest in sleep, but I knew that I'd need it. Tomorrow... it all would begin.

* * *

**Kinda not the right tone to be saying this, but anyways, MERRY BELATED-X-MAS! And Hanukkah, and I think Kwanzaa? Well, happy holidays!  
So Chapter 2's not as long as the first one, but I wanted to just post it anyway because it's a good place to end for the theme I'm going with  
Btw, I mite as well warn everyone now since I'm not sure if everyone knows - the fic is NaruxSaku, but also SasuxSaku, and SasuxNaru - basically, SasuxNaruxSaku, if that makes any sense  
Also, sorry for Naruto's mini-rant - I wanted to show him thinking seriously, which was harder than I thought it would be .  
so with that, i bid you once more - happy holidays, and seasons greetings!  
p.s. reviews are the best christmas present of all! lol**


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